Today my beloved B would have been 72 years old.  He was an incredible human being, very perceptive when it came to people and situations.  Stubborn as hell and a little self absorbed but he had the biggest heart and would do just about anything for his family and friends.  He taught me how to respect myself and build and keep a friendship. He didn't hesitate to marry a woman with 2 small children and then proceed to adopt them and give them his family name. (their natural father couldn't have cared less)  He adored his grandchildren and thought the sun rose and sat on his nieces and nephews.  He loved his USMC and made it known that he was a Marine every single chance he got. The last few years of his life, even when the chemo and radiation made him very ill, he complained very little and never ever felt sorry for himself.  One of the last times we went to dinner with friends, I knew he didn't feel like going, but I persuaded him to go anyway.  Someone took our picture that evening and after I saw it the guilt I felt was overwhelming, I never "made" him go anywhere he didn't want to go after that.  When someone says it's hard to put into words how they feel, believe them.  There are no words, written or spoken, that can describe the empty, black, bottomless feeling of grief I have in my soul since he has been gone.  I will forever love him.....